Feeling Like a Fraud? Why High Achievers Feel Like Fakes
Have you ever felt like a fraud in your own life, doubting your abilities despite evidence of success? You’re not alone. This feeling, known as impostor syndrome, is an experience of chronic self-doubt and the persistent belief that we are not as competent as others perceive us to be. Surprisingly common among high achievers, impostor syndrome can cause feelings of inadequacy, anxiety, and even guilt over one’s accomplishments. While it’s not an official mental health diagnosis, impostor syndrome is a widely recognized phenomenon that affects people from all walks of life, especially women and minority groups, who may face additional social and cultural pressures.
Valerie Young, Ed.D., author of The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women, has done extensive research on impostor syndrome and its complexities. She explains that it’s not solely the result of personal experiences or personality traits. Instead, it’s deeply intertwined with societal expectations, stereotypes, and implicit biases. These external factors often reinforce the internalized belief that we don’t deserve our achievements, particularly if we belong to a group that has traditionally been marginalized or undervalued in professional or academic spaces.
Why Certain Groups are More Prone to Impostor Syndrome
Impostor syndrome is not equally distributed among all people, and for good reason. Women, ethnic minorities, and first-generation professionals often experience impostor syndrome at higher rates. This isn’t merely a coincidence. Many of these groups face additional societal expectations and stereotypes, making them more susceptible to feelings of inadequacy. For instance, women and minorities may be subjected to "stereotype threat," where they feel added pressure to perform well to counter negative stereotypes. First-generation college graduates or professionals may feel like outsiders in unfamiliar environments, intensifying their self-doubt.
These external pressures can make it harder to internalize success. The result? High-achieving individuals from these groups may attribute their accomplishments to luck or external factors rather than their own skills or hard work, reinforcing impostor feelings.
The Five Types of Impostor Syndrome
In her book, Young identifies five types of impostor syndrome, each with its own unique set of challenges:
1. The Perfectionist: Perfectionists set unrealistically high standards for themselves and believe that anything short of flawless is a failure. Even when they achieve their goals, they often fixate on minor mistakes, which reinforces a cycle of self-doubt and fear of being "found out" (For more information, check out my blog post on perfectionism).
2. The Superwoman/Superman: These individuals push themselves to work harder than everyone else to prove their worth. They often equate their self-worth with how much they accomplish, which can lead to overwork, burnout, and a constant need to take on more tasks to "measure up."
3. The Natural Genius: These individuals believe that success should come easily or on the first try. They may think that needing to put in effort is a sign of incompetence, which can discourage them from pursuing challenging tasks and even make them want to quit when things get hard.
4. The Soloist: Soloists equate success with individual achievement. They feel uncomfortable and resist asking for help or accepting support, as they believe needing assistance is a sign of inadequacy or weakness.
5. The Expert: Experts measure their competence based on how much they know or how skilled they are in a particular area. They often fear they don’t know "enough" and continuously seek more certifications, knowledge, or training, thinking it will eventually make them feel qualified.
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Overcoming Impostor Syndrome
Impostor syndrome doesn’t disappear overnight, but with time, effort, and support, you can work toward overcoming it. Here are some strategies to help manage and reduce impostor feelings:
1. Acknowledge Your Achievements: Regularly remind yourself of your successes. Write down your accomplishments, big and small, and revisit them when self-doubt creeps in.
2. Reframe Your Thinking: Challenge the belief that needing help, taking time to learn, or making mistakes makes you unqualified. Growth and learning are part of any journey.
3. Practice Self-Compassion: Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding you would offer to a friend. Self-compassion can be a powerful tool for countering self-doubt and reducing perfectionistic tendencies.
4. Set Realistic Goals: Avoid overloading yourself with impossible standards. Setting realistic, achievable goals can help reduce feelings of inadequacy while allowing you to celebrate incremental progress.
5. Seek Support: Talking to a trusted friend, mentor, or therapist can be a crucial part of managing impostor syndrome. Professional guidance can provide validation and practical tools to help you move past self-doubt and recognize your accomplishments.
If you’re feeling stuck in impostor syndrome and want support in building self-confidence, reaching out to a therapist can make a real difference. At Graceful Mind Therapy, I’m here to help you understand and overcome these feelings so you can feel more grounded and empowered. Don’t hesitate to reach out. I’m here to walk with you on this journey.
by Maria Perdomo-Torres, LCSW-S, MHA, CFSW
