What People with a Foreign Accent Would Want You to Know
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In the United States, where immigration has shaped the nation’s history and continues to enrich its future, foreign accents are everywhere. You’ve probably heard someone speak English with a foreign accent—at work, school, or while ordering coffee. For many of us, accents are more than just a way of speaking; they carry stories of identity, culture, and personal history.
Having a foreign accent isn’t just about where someone comes from. It’s also a shared experience that binds us together, transcending individual backgrounds. Just as many women share an unspoken understanding of navigating life as a woman, or how Black individuals may have a shared experience of being profiled, people with foreign accents understand what it’s like to move through society with a voice that sets them apart.
Unlike playful regional differences, like a Southern drawl or a New York accent, having a foreign accent often touches on deeper feelings of belonging, identity, and even vulnerability. Our accents can spark curiosity and connection, but they can also lead to assumptions, biases, and exclusion.
I know this because I live it every day. I speak English with a foreign accent too. My accent is like a name tag I can’t take off. It introduces me before I even get to share who I am. And while I’ve learned to embrace it, I’ve also felt the sting of assumptions and judgments that come with it.
Let’s dive deeper into the experiences of those who speak with a foreign accent and uncover what they would want native speakers to know. Together, we can bridge the gap between intention and impact.
Accents Are Not a Measure of Intelligence
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Let’s get this out of the way: an accent is not a reflection of someone’s intelligence or competence. Period.
And yet, people often equate an accent with confusion or ignorance. Research backs this up—studies show that people with accents are often perceived as less credible, even when their ideas and expertise are just as valid. These biases can have real-world consequences, from being overlooked for promotions to feeling dismissed during discussions.
What’s heartbreaking is how this bias can make incredibly talented people feel small or second-guess themselves. Accents are simply a reflection of how someone learned to speak—shaped by the sounds and speech patterns of their early environment. And when you think about it, that’s a testament to their journey, not a limitation. In fact, accents enrich our shared linguistic landscape. Hearing different accents strengthens our ability to recognize a broader range of sounds and reinforces neural pathways, making us more adaptable and attentive listeners. It’s a win-win for everyone.
Having an Accent Does Not Equal Lack of Listening Comprehension
One misconception about people with foreign accents is that they don’t fully understand the language they’re speaking. While this could sometimes be true, it shouldn’t be an automatic assumption. Having an accent does not equal limited language proficiency. Fluency goes beyond pronunciation. It’s about comprehension, cultural nuance, and meaningful engagement. People with foreign accents can be just as fluent as native speakers.
And here’s a twist: not everyone with a foreign accent learned English as a second language. In countries like India, Nigeria, or South Africa, English is often a primary language. A “foreign accent” in those cases just reflects a different way of speaking English, not a lack of fluency or understanding.
If you’re struggling to understand someone with an accent, maybe the problem isn’t with them—it might be on your end. Just because their speech sounds different to you doesn’t mean they can’t understand you perfectly well. Assuming otherwise can come across as dismissive or condescending. Instead, approach conversations with curiosity and openness. Remember, communication is about connection.
The Desire for Understanding, Not Pity
Here is an important distinction. People with accents don’t want pity; they want understanding and respect. Pity feels patronizing and creates an unnecessary power imbalance. What makes a difference is patience and a willingness to listen.
By practicing inclusive communication and showing curiosity without condescension, you can help bridge communication gaps and help create a space where authentic connection can happen. Supportive environments can make such a difference. They convey the message, “I value what you’re saying.” It’s not about being perfect; it’s about being present.
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Practical Tips for Engaging with Someone Who Has a Foreign Accent
If you’re wondering how to show patience and understanding, here are some simple ways to make a big difference:
Speak Clearly but Naturally: Avoid slowing down excessively or oversimplifying your speech, unless the person specifically requests it. You may mean well, but talking like you’re reading a bedtime story to a toddler can feel patronizing.
Don’t Interrupt or Finish Their Sentences: I get it. You’re trying to help. But jumping in can feel dismissive and take away their chance to express themselves fully. Give them the space to share their thoughts.
Use Open Body Language, but Don’t Overdo It: Making eye contact, nodding, and offering a warm smile show that you’re engaged, but avoid exaggerating these gestures. It can feel performative or insincere. Keep it natural.
Ask for Clarification if Needed: It’s totally okay to say, “I didn’t quite catch that, can you repeat it?” It shows you care about understanding.
Avoid Imitating Their Accent: Even if you think it’s funny or endearing, it can come off as mocking or dismissive. Don’t do it, unless you know the person very well and they’ve expressed they don’t mind it.
Don’t Call Their Accent “Cute” or Use Similar Adjectives: Calling someone’s accent “cute” or another diminutive adjective is not the compliment you think it is. I am not your puppy.
These small, thoughtful actions can help create conversations where people with accents feel respected, understood, and able to show up as their full, amazing selves.
Conclusion
Accents are not barriers. They’re bridges to richer conversations and deeper understanding. They tell stories of migration, resilience, and cultural pride.
I hope this post encourages you to pause and reflect the next time you hear someone speaking with an accent. Are you making space for their voice? Are you approaching the conversation with respect and curiosity?
If this resonates with you, I’d love to connect. Follow me on Instagram or Threads for more insights on culture, communication, and compassion. If you’re ready to take the next step in your personal journey, contact Graceful Mind Therapy to get started. Let’s celebrate diversity, one conversation at a time.
by Maria Perdomo-Torres, LCSW-S, MHA, CFSW
